Pregnancy Talk
by Asking Me Where My Love Grows
Summary: "It can happen to a woman after she copulates with a man without using protection." "An STD?"/ Or, Ginny and Hermione talk pregnancy. Friendship Fic.


**A/N: **This was originally going to be about Hermione telling Ron she was pregnant and turned into Hermione and Ginny talking about the birds and the bee gees. Oh welsh, I like this better anyway. I hope you enjoy or at least get a laugh out of it.

**disclaimer time - **I don't own Harry Potter because I'm not J.K Rowlings. I am a ginger though, if that counts for anything.

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><p>Ginny observed her hysterical friend over the rim of her ceramic coffee cup, eyes twinkling with unhidden amusement.<p>

It wasn't often she got to see Hermione off her rocker and – dammit – she was going to enjoy it!

"Ginny," Hermione started shakily, "How did you know?"

The youngest Weasley raised a ginger eyebrow. "I'm not sure what you mean."

Hermione looked both ways to see if someones listening. Ginny wasn't exactly sure why, since they were the only two people on this whole floor. She kept her mouth shut though and waited for her friend to say what was on her mind.

"How did you know when you were... you know."

"Um, I really have no clue what you're babbling about."

"It can happen to a woman after she copulates with a man without using protection..."

"Copulate?"

"Sex, Ginny. To copulate with someone means to have sex."

"What happens after a women and a man fuck without using a rubber?" Ginny said to herself, "I don't know. An STD?"

"Merlin! I'm trying to ask you how you knew when you were pregnant!" Hermione nearly screamed.

"Oi! No need to get snippy with me! Why didn't you just say so?"

Hermione shifted uncomfortably, "I'm not comfortable using that word yet.

Ginny stared at Hermione in disbelief, "I can't believe I'm friends with you."

"I can't believe you thought your brother gave me an STD."

Ginny smirked, before looking down at her growing belly fondly. She was seven months pregnant with a beautiful baby boy, name still being decided at the current time. Knowing Harry it would probably be a name to honor someone lost in the war. Right now her bet was on James.

She didn't mind that. James would be a perfect name for her little man.

"Well, a pregnancy test helps."

"There's pregnancy tests for witches?" Hermione asked.

"Wow, you are new to this." Ginny snorted, "Of course there are! We're witches, not aliens! Wizard babies come out just like muggle babies, through the vag-"

"Okay, that's enough." Hermione said nervously.

Ginny rolled her eyes, reaching over the table with a grunt to grab the baby monitor that Harry had already installed.

"Harry Potter, do you read me?" She laughed into the receiver.

"Loud and clear." He responded almost immediately.

"Good! Do we have anymore pregnancy tests?"

"Gin, I'm pretty sure that you're definitely pregnant..."

"Not for me, you ninny! For Hermione!"

"HERMIONE'S PREGNANT?" Harry shouted.

"Merlin! No need to shout! Pregnancy's not that big of a deal! It's what happens when a woman copulates with a man without using protection!" Ginny sent Hermione a wink.

"...Copulate?"

Hermione slammed her head against the table.

"It means sex."

"Why didn't you just say sex?"

"I'm expanding my vocabulary." Ginny snorted, "Anyway, about those pregnancy tests..."

"I think we might have an extra in the bathroom closet."

"Also, can you pick me up some cockroach clusters at Honeydukes?"

"Already on it."

"Fantastic." Ginny grinned.

Hermione's nose wrinkled in disgust, "Cockroach clusters?"

"It's an acquired taste." Ginny shrugged.

Before Hermione knew what was happening, she was being grabbed by the wrist and thrust into the bathroom by a fiery redhead.

"Pregnancy test's in the closet!" Ginny hollered through the door, "So, should I hope for a negative or a positive?

Hermione hadn't really thought about that. The impact hit her like a fist to the gut, nearly causing her to drop the pregnancy test into the toilet bowl.

Were her and Ron ready to have a baby?

She licked her dry lips, "I think... I think I want a baby girl."

Ginny smiled from where she sat outside the door, "Well then, let's hope you're fertile."

Ten minutes later, Hermione's sweating hands hovered over the pregnancy test.

"Even if you're not pregnant, you probably won't mind having to fuck my brother again." Ginny said bluntly from where she sat on the rim of the tub. Maybe it was the pregnancy hormones or maybe it was her general impatience, she just really wanted to see the results of the test.

"I don't know if -" Hermione started.

Ginny groaned, standing up from her seat and snatching up the little stick, "You're preggers. Can I go now? I want to see if Harry's back with my cockroach clusters!"

Ginny shoved the test into Hermione's hands before waddling out the door. The new mother to be stared down at the little pink plus sign, a feeling of pure elation rising in her chest.

She was ready. Ready to raise a family.


End file.
